Could have smelled A LOT worse

DISCLAIMER: You’ll have to excuse me because I’m suffering at the moment from what can only be described MASSIVE TECHNOLOGY FAIL. This is my third attempt at this post, and I despise re-doing things more than anything else, so I can feel myself being abrupt, irratable, and not at all funny. Because I have limited amounts of snark in me this week and I used most of it up in a post that just spontaneously combusted somewhere inside my iPhone.

Ok. I’m done bitching.

I really just wanted to accomplish 3 things in this post.

1.) To show you this awesome varmit trap that MysteryMan’s grandpa built out of a grocery cart and some twine.  Yes, he puts my MacGyvering skills to shame, and yes, he is my hero.

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photo2

 

2.) The second thing has two parts. First, to tell you that we strongly suspect the same mystery varmit that has been digging up our yard has been using the future workshop as a flop-house. My suspicions were aroused when, in cleaning out the shop, I discovered the 80 foot tarp had been being used as a varmit toilet for an extended period of time. As far as discoveries go, that one sucked. But it did lead to the second thing I wanted to tell you about this which really is just shamelss bragging: I found I have the remarkable ability to control a smelly 80 foot tarp in high winds with one hand while taking a picture.

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And now that we have plummed the very depths of my talents…

3.) After debating with friends, family, and neighbors… a Council of Farmers finally put to rest the big mystery of what has been digging up our yard, and apparently pooping in our tarps. MysteryMan set his granpa’s varmit trap to catch it, and shortly thereafter the Council of Farmers decided that what we likey had (and as some of you guessed) was a VERY. HUNGRY. SKUNK. At the moment of this revelation MysteryMan and I both looked at eachother with identical expressions of Holy-shit-I-hope-we-didn’t-catch-that-thing. Because no possible way we could get it out of the varmit trap without getting sprayed.

Thank god MysteryMan’s dad had the presence of mind to disengage the trap, or else this would have been a MUCH different post.

Whew.

2 Responses

  1. I am impressed with that trap, can I borrow it.? I still have 8 feral kitty’s that need to be TNR’d. I can get a whole family in that device.

  2. We use those to trap homeless folks when we tag them for study after we release them back into the wild.

    ^
    ||
    Kidding

    I thought that there was some credibility to the skunk guess.

    Crikey! He’s a beaut!

    M

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I'm not interested in a mediocre life. I'm here to kick ass or die.

(formerly DIYdiva.net)
THE STORYTELLER

Back in 2004 I started writing about my adventures in fixing up houses on the internet. A lot of things have changed since then, with me, with my houses, and with the internet. These days I am basically a cranky old man trapped in a slightly less old woman’s body. The internet has changed and I am staunchly refusing to change with it. You won’t find any algorithms here, or feeds, or ads, or social media. Just good old-fashioned stories about a woman drinking beer and building shit, and living an unexpected life.

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