Things I Am Debating At 2AM While Eating A Banana Pancake

I just spent three hours laying in bed, staring at my ceiling, mentally demoing and reconstructing the closets in the master bedroom (think: barn doors flanked by built-ins) and trying to summon enough willpower not to buy a 75% off cordless stapler from a shady online retailer through my iPad. I’m pretty sure I didn’t go through with the transaction, but twice in the last two weeks I’ve been surprised by packages on my front porch that contained items I’m 100% sure were purchased after midnight, and only 63% sure were actually purchased by me. (What? That cat is a sneaky bastard.)

The first package was this light, and the second was a six-foot tall chalkboard that I came home to today…


(More on my plans for this baby later.)

This is what happens when Power Tool Junkie meets Insomniac, and it ain’t pretty. What I would really like more than anything right now is to be well rested, but I’m settling for eating a banana pancake and writing what is sure to be the least coherent post ever published on this website instead.

So, let’s have a little late-night therapy session and talk about some of the big things my brain is debating right now that may or may not be contributing to my 2AM carb binges:

1.) I need a staple gun. Cord or no cord?

Let’s not count all of the many things I need a staple gun for, suffice it to say I do. And I effing love my Paslode cordless finish nailer, so I’ve been thinking if I’m going to buy a staple gun, I’m going to go with this the Passlode 16ga cordless version.

But when you go cordless, you pay for cordless, and this baby will run me at least $350-400.

On the other hand, I could get a good Bostitch model that hooks up to the air compressor for $100-150. The problem is that I hate the air compressor. I hate lugging it around. I hate the noise of it. I hate disentangling myself from the cord every five seconds. And I especially hate using it inside.

I’m kind of thinking if I’m price-conscious now and go with the pneumatic version, there’s still a high-likelyhood that I’ll trip over the cord, chip a tooth, and then go buy the cordless version out of spite, but the upshot is that the corded versions come in an 18ga, instead of the 16 ga Passlode.

So basically what I’m saying is I need one of each. For every tool that ever existed.

2.) Every girl needs her own truck. Probably. 

One of the things I didn’t think all the way through when I moved out of my last house (and relationship) was that I also lost easy access to a pickup truck. So here’s where I’m at right now: Love the big yellow SUV but I drive 100 miles to and from work every day, so I’m paying a shitload in gas money every month. She’s a good work vehicle except if you need full sheets of drywall or plywood, and then you’re screwed.

So I’ve been thinking that what I need to do is buy an old work truck (primarily for stuff around the property and random trips to Lowe’s) and then trade the SUV in for something more gas efficient for the long haul to my day job and back. I mean I have a barn that is essentially a 30 car garage, I need to start filling that baby up.

Then I think on it for 3 days and decide, no, my SUV is paid off so I might as well just keep it and get myself a little 5×8 trailer for hauling larger items, especially since we’re coming up on winter and that 4WD is nice to have on my primary vehicle when the roads are bad.

Then my grandpa finds a good deal on an old truck and I get my checkbook ready and go take a look at it, thinking I’m about to be a proud truck owner, but I just can’t pull the trigger. And then the debate cycle starts all over again. This is what it’s like being in the head of a crazy person.

So we’re going to a police impound auction on Saturday, and you guys know what happened the last time I was involved in an auction? Yeah. I’m going to come home with a small fleet of dump-trucks probably.

3.) What the shit do I start next?

This is really probably my biggest issue right now, even though I’m pretty sure the whole car/truck debate is giving me a spasm on the entire left side of my face.

I know I need to finish some projects up before I start a new big endeavor around the house, but even though I’ve made lists and said I’ve made decisions, I still haven’t really settled on my next move. The big debate seems like it’s kitchen vs. master bed/bath, but there are a couple of other substantial projects I could throw in the mix like refinishing the parlor and entry floors or putting hardwood in the upstairs hallway. I kind of want to go for the quickest win right now, but I don’t even know what that would be at this point. So instead I painted the little downstairs hallway last weekend and then bought a six-foot chalkboard. Which basically makes no sense, but hey, I’ve inhaled quite a bit of sawdust in the last couple of years and you just can’t expect me to be All There all the time, okay?

So that’s what is keeping me up at night (well, and the fact that I’m totally chemically imbalanced), what about you?

36 Responses

  1. Amazon currently has that bostitch stapler as a reconditioned unit for $40. Buy it.

    If you have one of the smaller pancake compressors, consider getting something with a bigger tank on wheels. With a larger tank it doesn’t cycle as much and the bigger units aren’t usually as annoyingly noisy.

    1. I’ve got a big one on wheels… I think it weighs something like 135 pounds, so more than me. lol getting it in the house, or god-forbid upstairs to put in flooring? Ugh. I was actuallything thinking I might have to go opposite and buy a little pancake compressor for the portability, but really, when it comes to portability you might as well just go cordless!

      1. I leave my compressor outside or in the garage when using air tools. 1 or 2 extra hoses give me all the reach I need.

  2. Would love a staple gun myself! Otherwise, no opinion or knowledge concerning choices.

    However, being a low-carb eater, I know from experience that if I stay too low carb my metabolism runs wicked high/fast and I have severely interrupted sleep or cannot sleep. Add that to a mind that doesn’t want to take a break from my project list and then I have to get up and find something major carb to slow it down a bit. Just a thought.

  3. My vote is to either keep the paid off vehicle and get a trailer or maybe sell it, get a Subaru for better gas mileage and 4WD and a trailer. Or FWD with snow tires isn’t that terrible in the winter, at least in Ohio.

    I did the Craigslist beater pickup for errant hardware store, landscaping and vintage motorcycle purchasing runs and while it was cheap and got the job done, I’m ready to get rid of it. I don’t drive it all that often so I need to keep it on a battery charger and you still have the random maintenance and repairs and don’t forget the insurance you have to pay monthly. No insurance for a trailer and in Ohio, plates/registration is cheaper. And my wife’s CR-V (and even my Civic) can tow 1500 lbs. which is the max rated load of my trailer. Anyway, that’s my plan.

  4. When Chris and I are there I will teach you how to wrap cable like a champ so that you never get knots and you don’t trip over it. It’s possibly the best thing about working in sports broadcasting: meet players, walk on the field…no, I can wrap every single extension cord we have so that it never gets a knot again. It’s amazing.

      1. I have one compressor hose that puts me in a bad mood just thinking about having to untangle it to get it to where I need it and then untangle it again to wrap it up and put it away. Sometimes I just do something else so I don’t have to dela with the damn hose!

  5. First, regarding the stapler/air compressor situation. I do not know what kind of compressor you have now but if it is oiless than that is why it is freaking loud. I had one and hated everytime I kicked that thing on. I upgraded to an oiled and it is half the volume, but of course, twice the price.

    Second, I am with you on the truck situation. I love my GTO and I will NOT be trading it for a truck (or anything more gas efficient) but it doesn’t carry cargo so well. Then if I buy a beater truck I have to pay for the insurance for another vehicle. I am crossing my fingers my boyfriend trades in his SUV for a truck, so we can both use it!

    MMMMmmmmm, banana pancakes!

  6. 1) That’s a good lookin’ woman holding the chalkboard against the wall!
    2) 5×8 trailer – don’t do it. I bought a 4×8 mail-order (assembly and finishing required) that turned out to be 3’10+1/2″ by 7′ 10+1/2″ by the time I got sides on it. It folds in half( don’t need that) and the bed tilts (but it’s too small for the mower). It’s too small and narrow for dimensional lumber. I’m in process of buying a 5 x 10 (TSC #0191160) which will be “just right”.
    3) I vote AGAINST staples – except maybe for floors. My house came with a 10′ x 36′ deck on three levels that was constructed with – you guessed it – staples! Not only weak – but ugly. My opinion is that staples are the fastener of choice by slicko contractors that aren’t interested in quality – just in speed and cheap.
    4) Reminder – “MID-NITE PM” = no sleeping aide hangover! Please – slow down and take care!

    1. Funny, putting in my hardwood floor is one of the things I want the stapler for. It’s only 3/8″ thick so a traditional floor stapler/nailer won’t work.

      Plus I like it for cabinet building and small projects (most notibly, framing in that chalkboard!)

      Of course I’ve got framing and finish nailers for when those are most appropriate, but frankly, the deck should always be done with screws!

  7. Can’t live without my pickup, but have you thought of a team of miniature donkeys and a wagon? You could be your own parade every Saturday.

    I use my air actuated staple guns all the time and love them. What you need is a bigger air compressor. Put the air compressor in one of those 50 barns you have and run airline to the house. You could install airline to every room of the house. You know, every room could have a connection for phone, network, cable, and compressed air. Just think how much easier that next big dinner would be to prepare if you had compressed air in the kitchen? Yep… fellow insomniac here.

    1. Ha. I am not beyond hooking air up in every room, but I’m pretty sure that’s cost prohibitive instead of, you know, just going cordless. lol.

  8. I have a 2003 Tundra and a 2004 Highlander cuz I need both. Gotta have my 4WD for winter! And a contractor’s rack can carry ANYTHING! I can do 16′ with ease!

    Since I have been fighting a cold and coughing all night I’m redesigning the kitchen of the rental house in town in my head all night this week. I eventually plan to move into this 1911 Craftsman, but not for YEARS. But I am getting the kitchen figured out!

    1. How’d you guess? Tots & Tools will be opening it’s doors soon… I’ll be using the kids as slave labor to build little chicken coops out in the barn.

  9. The blog of a crazy person is infinitely more entertaining than anything a sane person could pull off. Keep up the fun, but get some sleep already (says the non-insomniac who has no idea what you’re dealing with – sorry!).

  10. We have a beater pickup (it’s actually awesome – ’76 Chevy 4wd) that we have non-op’ed and use for hauling wood and crap around the property. But that won’t help you off your farm. We also have two other pickups, one with 4wd. And no commuter cars which means I’m housebound something like every day of the week except for one since going to church or the grocery store is a 30 mile one way drive. Couple that with the fact that my 4×4 is a diesel and we pay $4.55/gal and, yeah, it ain’t pretty. We have a trailer (one of those larger ones you can buy at the blue box store) – that thing is worth its weight in gold.

    1. Oh, there is so much to do with the donkey barn and putting the pasture fence up that it will probably be Spring 2013!

  11. I vote that you do your master bedroom first. Because later on when you are dead tired from working on your kitchen you will have a beautiful space that you love to relax in before you fall asleep. I say this from experience, it took me too long to do my bedroom. Once it was done (mostly) when I’m stressing on other projects before I go to sleep at night I look around and it makes me smile. Good luck!

  12. I’d start with outdoors/winter prep while the weather is tolerable. Everything else you can do to prevent cabin fever when you get snowed in.

  13. My two cents from a fellow single, 30 something homeowner who currently has a clock sitting on her (makeshift) kitchen table that seems have come from England but with only a vague recollection of ordering. 

    I am personally going cordless over corded. While I don’t have have an air compresor any more they are loud and heavy and most importantly my tools often stay where they land for weeks at a time.  The cordless stapler is a hell of a lot easier to shove in a closet or on a shelf when I am frantically picking shit up because someone is coming over then having to haul a compressor and various hoses out to the shed. I know myself and my habits and guarenteed I will end up having an air compressor & hose in my living room for months if not years.

    I am in the same predicament vehicle wise though my commute varies from the twenty steps between my bed and my desk to about a 1000 km a week. I am going the SUV + trailer route with the purchase of something small and fun to drive May to October, most likely a Mini or a Jeep.  My CRV is paid off, I like having the flexibility of having a trailer so I can load things like the snowblower and garden tractor on it if I need too and still have the hatch for the dog and her crate or the really big Costco runs. I also do a lot of out of town road and bike races and effectively live out of my car from May to September and need the extra space so I can accumulate the enough detritus to keep me entertained and feed while stranded on the highway for 12 hours in December (true story).

    As for projects I am writing this with a large glass of wine knowing I have no choice as to what to start next. I have officially reached that point  where I have to start scraping the cheap latex over oil mess that exists thanks to the “spruce up” the last owners did when they put the house up for sale. The good news is that it scraps off like butter. The bad is that it is on EVERY SINGLE SURFACE, every walls, ceiling and piece of trim save for a 3 X 6 section of wall and 8 feet of baseboard. Awesome.

  14. I am reading all these after a long Friday at work, and it is too exhausting to even consider these things…here is my 2 cents:
    1. fuel efficient pick up with an extended cab
    2. the “I hate” statements are directional – don’t ignore them
    3. do another oil painting
    4. or finish just one little thing completely – a win!

  15. I actually agree with the comment to finish the Master Bedroom. You need one room that’s done and is your sanctuary. Since you are on the go 20 hours a day, I can’t think of any other room in the house where you would stay put for more than an hour or two at a time. And looking at a finished room as the last thing you see when you go to bed and first thing you see in the morning would certainly help your state of mind.

    Holy crap – I think I just talked myself into finishing my Master Bedroom….

  16. Maybe I am backwards but I did the kitchen first in my house…the time you spend in the bedroom you will have your eyes closed…I just could not stand to look at my kitchen the way it was, even though it really wasn’t that bad and all the wall in the house were painted the same strange color. Don’t put so much pressure on yourself to always make a well thought out decision. Do whatever you feel like in the moment…it’s more fun that way. Everyone always has their own idea what the logical thing to work on is, but the person that buys a house without seeing the inside and drives 100 miles a day for work so she can own this awesome property doesn’t seem like the type to listen to logic. Do whatever project you feel like…your house isn’t going to burn down if you work on the master bedroom before the kitchen. Good luck. Looking forward to seeing what you get done this weekend!

    1. “…but the person that buys a house without seeing the inside and drives 100 miles a day for work so she can own this awesome property doesn’t seem like the type to listen to logic” Holy crap, truer words were never spoken on this website. lol. It’s so true, and I feel like it gives me permission to just continue being crazy and painting random hallways in the house. Thank you!

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